Thursday, March 29, 2007

Look. Listen. Kneel. Pray.

Yeah. How scary is this?

It's interesting that I came across this image, courtesy of the wonderful Feministing, shortly after I wrote a post wherein I talked about how we weren't having children because of our schedules. If only my wife would give up her lucrative and fulfilling and intellectually stimulating career (which pays more than mine), and pump out a few rugrats, well then dammit, we'd have fewer illegal immigrants to run rampant through our country and swallow up our welfare rolls and rape our cub scouts. (insert obligatory joke about cub scout leaders doing the job just fine). Of course, we'd have to sell our house since we wouldn't be able to pay the damn mortgage.

If anyone cares, the poster above is from an anti-feminist group called "Quiverfulls", which are women determined to have as many children as possible (minimum six) and home school them, take them only to fundamentalist churches, and raise them to be a part of "God's Army". To which I say: Yikes.

Seriously, what is the conservative obsession with having children? When did people who either a) don't have kids or b) have just one or two, somehow become villains? Actually, I guess the more important question, for both these Quiverfull whack-jobs and the rest of Conservative America is...

Why can't you just leave us the fuck alone?


Final note: I'd like to see one of these so-called Quiverfull "soldiers of God" say that (what's on the poster) to my wife's face. Because... well... because I've never seen a person with a bible shoved up their ass.

Final final note. For some reason, the one of the first things that came to mind when thinking about the Quiverful perfect family was this video. One of my all-time favorite songs, "A Little Time", by The Beautiful South. How's that for domestic bliss, motherfuckers?


litelysalted said...

Why can't you just leave us the fuck alone?

Amen. I'm 29 and Mr. Salted is 32. We're building a new house with one spare room that is to be my OFFICE. (So yes, career woman!) Kids just don't factor into the equation and neither of us have ever had even a remote desire to be parents. To be honest I'm not sure I'd want to bring kids into this frightening world, anyway.

But still... There are people I have encountered that seem to take it as a personal insult that we don't want to have children. And we happen live in somewhat moderate Pennsylvania! I can only imagine that happens to couples without children who live in the South or Midwest.

Have you seen Jesus Camp yet? Oh god... The horror...

New Texan said...

I'm with you man... we are in the "should we or shouldn't we" period right now, but economically, we couldn't... well, we could, but we'd have to sell our big ass house... and I like our big ass house. And my wife likes her job.

The one thing that we kick around a lot though is adoption, and it looks more and more like a route we may choose in a few years.

I've always thought that conservative religious whackos tried to get women to pump out multiple kids because that allows for control over the women.

A Bowl Of Stupid said...

Is it just me or does the chick from that video look like she was the model for those creepy "O" face masks worn by the kids in "The Wall"?

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some other more interesting blogs to read.

TK said...

LS - I haven't, but I'm dying to! I did see Friends of God, which is both fascinating and horrifying.

NT - I think you're right. What's scarier is that they've succeeded in persuading women that being controlled is the right thing.

Matt - Two things:
1. Um... I'm not sure how to say this, but- I've... neverseenthewall. There, I said it.
2. Aww, look at Suzy Sensitive. Should I come over there and post a picture of us holding hands, or are you too busy crying in the shower?

Ranylt said...

Lightly (and TK)

I am chiming in to give y'all a massive AMEN on two counts. One, I just literally finished watching Jesus Camp. Not that any of it was news, but it was hard to watch adults emotionally abuse kids like that (and have it rammed home that I am definitely the devil to those people).

Two, re. wanting "to be left alone": I'm 36, been with the same guy for over 5 years (who's 35), and there are no kids on the horizon at all. I have never really felt the yen, what can I say? I've met some wonderful kids, though, and some wonderful happy parents, but it's the people who look at me like I'm broken when, after they've pried into my personal choices with pepperpot relentlessness, find out I'm just not that into it. I've actually been called "selfish."

Now, if the human species were about to die out, I can see how that could hold a little water...

Anonymous said...

You poor bloggers. My heart goes out to you. Jesus loves you so very much. He died for you. Even with all your hatred and cursing, He still loves you and is waiting for you to come to Him. Come out from your sinfull ways, repent. There is no better life than to serve the Lord. When your life is over, what will you have acomplished for Jesus? All the materialistic stuff you gather here on earth, you can't take with you.
Children are small gifts the Lord gives a man and his wife. Our children are the only thing we can take to Heaven or Hell with us.
You have a choice to make...will you continu to be a slave to the world's demands? Or will you allow Jesus to set you free?
There is so much hate blogs out there among the anti quiverfull realm. Why so much hate? Because you can't stand the fact that they are different? Thank God they are different and aren't going along with the ways of the world. The Bible tells Christians to come out from among the world and be seperate. Wow...
Quiverfull families are not selfish unlike society today. They sacrifice their life for their children to raise them up to not be life you all, full of hatred and unhappy in life.
It's better to raise children for th glory of the Lord then to get sucked into the trappings of the Devil.
I beg is a new day...look deep inside your there something missing? Are you empty inside, regardless of all the stuff you have? Jesus is your answer my friend.

General Zod said...

Jesus? Who is this Jesus?

I am General Zod! Your new ruler. Yes, today begins a new order. Your lands, your possessions, your very lives, will gladly be given in tribute to me, General Zod!

Come to me! I defy you! Come and kneel before Zod!

Oh, and don't forget to visit my website, where you can get a coupon for "2 for 1" drink specials at the "General Zod Bar & Grill" down off of Route 1. We're open until 2 a.m. every night this week!

TK said...

"Our children are the only thing we can take to Heaven or Hell with us."

Um... that's more than a little creepy. But thanks for your input.

And General Zod? Your drinks are watered down and the food sucks. Bring back some decent booze from Costa Rica.

Ranylt - hi there! Yeah, I hear you. I've got nothing against parenthood, and will probably do it some day. But what's the rush? And why do I need so many? I just don't get it.

litelysalted said...

Holy crap... You got invaded by Jesus Patrol!

TK said...

Litely - I KNOW! AWESOME, right?! I'm almost flattered! And btw, I saw Jesus Camp last night - amazing movie. And by "amazing", I mean "terrifying".

Maxine Dangerous said...

*snort* The levels of wrong ... and hilarious ... staggering. :)